Things I have learned from working with kids # 5 - Kids can be mean.

Youth for Unity is a program I hold weekly, Wednesdays, to teach kids how to confront bias and celebrate diversity.

With that said, it is the hardest program I've ever run.

For weeks the eight kids that constantly come to the program have chatted throughout the whole lesson, and I have to constantly remind them why we do this program and how their behavior is... counteractive.

Yesterday was an especially hard lesson, the kids had different scenarios of biased situations and they had to choose the correct response. And they would not SHUT UP.

Finally I had had it. Alicia and Alex were going back and forth, until Alicia started to cry AS DID Alex.

"This program is about respect. How can I graduate you guys next week and hold a party when you can't even respect each other or myself? For the rest of your lives, you will meet people and have to work with people you may not like or agree with, and you are going to have to deal with it, because no one will solve the problem for you." Yadda yadda yadda, respect this respect that.. I went on until Yesenia raised her hand.

She went into detail about Alicia, and how Alicia just tries to make people laugh, but then when it needs to be serious people yell at her, and how she was on meds when she was younger and was always teased about being bigger... on and on.

And poor Alicia cries harder, and talks about how her Mom left their family and Alicia felt it was because she didn't want her, and her father is a less than perfect role model (fucking racist, is what I surmised) and Alicia was always teased by the kids for being fat, and how she should take more of mer medication so she could be thinner, etc.

And then Yesenia starts to cry and apologizes for teasing her in the first grade,

and Edward starts to cry from listening to all this,

and Alex cries again because she gets bullied when she plays soccer and kids say downright SICK things to her about her foster parents,

and Louis starts to cry because he gets teased for WEARING SHORTS TOO OFTEN (yes, I know) and for hanging out with Robert, who's black,

and ROBERT starts to cry because, poor guy, who wouldn't...

and Vanesa, Catie and I are like... holy shit.

I just want to spill me guts (and I do) about how I have been there, and kids are insecure, and to fight that they are MEAN, and make fun of others for stuuuupid shit to get the attention of themselves. And everyone's crying and hugging and apologizing and sharing their stories of hurt and bias that happen to them every DAMN day and I think wow... kids are brutal... and I tell them maybe they earned their graduation after all.

On my friend

Thank you friend, and you know who you are, for reading and commenting on every single one of my blogs thus far. I take back every nasty comment I have ever thrown about your negligence on the blog front. I also take back the enmity I felt towards you last week - shrinky dinks would make perfectly nice jewelry and this one might just be that. I am also very sorrowful that I missed local's night... rain check for next week?